The strangest thing happened to me while I lived in England, the experience changed me and my destiny, the year was 1982.
At that time I was a rebellious young man, tired of lies and trickery that derived from people who knowingly mistreated other people for their own selfish gain.
Anyway, one of these power mongers had really done some bad things to me and my friends; he seemed to have absolutely no respect for others, thinking only of himself and his ambitions. I really despised him for what he had done and could not get it out of my system.
I dreamt about him nearly every night for a couple of weeks, taking my revenge out on him through my dreams. I became obsessed by it and thought that I was justified. I also believed that it was me who must stop him from hurting and tricking others. I did not want him to do these things against anyone else, in a way; I did it to reveal to him what he had done, so that he might stop himself.
Several months went by, and then we met again.
He saw me and came over to me, not the egomaniac that I knew, but a very humiliated man who asked my forgiveness, and within a moment my anger turned to pity. And after seeing this broken man, who reached out his hand to mine, I forgave him on the spot and he seemed relieved. It made me happy to see that he had realised his wrongdoings, and done something about it, which appeared to have changed him for the better. I heard later that he had been demoted from his top job. After that, we were both free from the battle. I never saw him again.
One week later
I thought about the affair quite a lot that week, I did not know if what I had done was right, to hate so much to bring justice, is this how it should be? What if I had done nothing? Maybe he would do the same to someone else; I received a very strong impression to ask God about it.
So I did, I felt that my whole soul thundered out to GOD, “How can so much hate bring justice”? I also wondered about what kind of God we all had. I felt confused about the whole thing.
But what I feared more than anything was to find out that our God was a God of wrath. This I thought would finally crush me and my faith in a totally loving God.
A few days later
I was taking a bath, and was alone in my apartment. When I heard someone call my name, I thought that someone had come in, so I wrapped a towel around my waist and went into the lounge to see who it was. Nobody had come in, I was alone, whilst I was looking around, I felt my towel being dragged down, I tried to hang on to it but whatever was pulling it off was stronger. As I looked up, there before me stood a dark cloaked figure, its arm pointing towards a wall in the room, I looked to where it was pointing. I could not move or say anything, I felt forced to stand there, naked before this black apparition, I could not see his face because he hid it behind a large hood.
It started talking.
The evil apparition said.
I will give you all the riches you desire,
I will give you power over all people,
I will give you powers to govern,
I will give you...
I will give you...
There seemed to be no end to what he would give me, I couldn’t move or say anything, then he said, sell me your soul,
And I will give you...
And I will give you...
That was enough, I did not know what a soul was then, but I knew enough that you do not sell it. (The Soul is the real you)
I also thought that power over all people was ludicrous, madness. I exploded, get out, “I shouted”, and pointed towards the same wall in the room, this evil thing then stopped talking and glided towards where I pointed and continued through the wall, and it was gone. I paced up and down the room, still naked, half panic stricken, wondering about what I had done.
A new apparition appeared.
Then! I heard another voice, it thundered in the back of my head. “Ian!” he spoke my name, I looked behind me, and before me was a man surrounded by light, he looked straight at me, he wore white robes and a gold coloured sash made of fabric, which covered most of his waist. His hands, I noticed, were twice the size as mine and he held them together in the prayer position.
He had long light brown hair with long side ringlets that resembled the Jewish style. He was tall and beautiful, powerful, a deep feeling swept over me, and it seemed to me that he knew everything. A man of truth and love, he is close to our Father.
Jesus! “I inquired", he acknowledged and smiled at me, then bowed his head. I looked up and down at him, and then I noticed that he was looking at me up and down. Remembering that I was still naked, and that he had come to me for a reason.
I pointed to where the black apparition had appeared, I thought about my ordeal with the power monger I disliked but had now forgiven. I also recalled my question to GOD. The answer is, that it is wholly wrong to retaliate, forcing a kind of justice of our own will, this kind of justice was wrong and evil, no matter what the result may be.
Jesus knew the truth, and I believed him. There came so much love from him that I just smiled all the time while he was with me. The purpose of his visit was fulfilled and after a couple of minutes he faded away.
At that time, I had no knowledge of Jesus or the bible
I read the bible afterwards, and in the end I finished it, only after putting it down many times, because of all the acts against God it portrayed and seemed to support. There is some good in it though, and its up to the reader to find it.
In time, I observed the lack of understanding that these so called religious sects taught and the moral emptiness they preached, in contrast to the total love that I saw in Jesus.
The years to come were given to searching for The Truth. I knew that I had to get rid of wrongs I had learnt, and believed were correct, but so many times found, were not of GOD, and served only to close my soul from his love. I found that you have to ask to receive; to be humble enough to ask what God's will is for us. I found out that it is the same for all of us.
God wants us to turn to Him, in humbleness and sincere longings with our souls alive in prayer, faith and trust. To love him, to ask him for His great gift that he is so willing to give us, and that we continually receive it, thereof, and the great gift. is His Divine Love.
Jesus parable, “The prodigal son”, explains this truth.
The son that left home to do it for himself, wasted what he had, he fell for the temptations and allurements of the world and ended up with nothing, starving, needy and humbled, he decides to return to his father. (God). Hoping that his father will forgive him and maybe give him work as a servant and a place to sleep. As he reaches this humbleness the Father sees him coming and goes out to meet him, His Father kisses him, puts a robe around him and a ring on his finger, His Father arranges a feast for his prodigal son.
(This symbolises the love of The Father, engulfing the son who returned and importantly, the sons will to receive it).
The other son. The moralist, the son governed by his own manmade laws. He didn’t like what he saw, one bit, jealousy and anger took over him, and he went to his father complaining. “I have never broken any of your laws, I have always done what you ask of me and never received anything like you have given to your other son, he who went away, and misused his inheritance.
“But son” replied The Father, “everything that your brother received is also for you to receive, you never asked me, this son was dead but has come to life, come in and rejoice”, but the son went away scorning and furious.
Good things can come through painful experiences, the pain tells us that there is something wrong, when the painful lesson has fulfilled its purpose, and the pain leaves us, and even greater harmony than we had before asserts itself. We may then look back and see that the pain was only our resistance to change and by not acknowledging that we were out of harmony with Gods laws.
Whether it was through willingly doing evil, through fear, through ignorance, or whatever the cause maybe, Gods law of eventual harmony will prevail, no matter how long the pain must be endured.
God is trying to guide His children home, this occurs when the children allow it to happen. God's will, is that we for fill our potential, angels are at one with God, progressing towards the fountainhead of our truly most wonderful loving and caring Father. God also works with his ever-ready angels (the redeemed ones) to help and aid, to show the way to the new birth, they surround us with God's love.
God’s truth never changes, only Mankind’s conception of it changes.
Pray to God for his great gift, save yourself; help our brothers and sisters out of their darkness.